Red means STOP

I consider myself a “rational” person – a “skeptic”, I put my faith in probability and the natural world. I am a member of the “Skeptics Society” and “Oregonians for Science and Reason”. I don’t believe in the supernatural be they UFOs, ghosts or God(s).

“Luck” is merely a perception; the personal attitude one takes regarding events that randomly happen in one’s life. Psychologists have studied luck and found that people’s perception of whether or not they are lucky can be altered by the way they look at it. All in all, good things and bad things happen to people in statistically predictable ways.

So all is in order in the universe and my outlook remains resolute and unbiased… except in one anomaly I cannot seem to reconcile: traffic lights.

You see, traffic lights somehow perceive my approach and turn red, forcing me to stop, with an uncanny regularity which I can only deduce are ordained directly against me. I notice, for example, if I am a passenger in a motor vehicle, the lights seem distinctly biased toward the green. However, if I am the driver, the light will invariably turn read as I approach.

My wife dismisses my belief; actually, she accuses me of being “irrational”. But I remain steadfast, as evidenced any time I need to be somewhere by a fixed period of time. My research further hypothesizes that the number of red traffic lights I encounter is inversely proportional to the amount of time required to reach my destination on time. In non-scientific terms; the more late I am for an appointment, the more of the traffic lights I encounter will be red.

My wife suggests I keep a notepad in the car on which to tally the number of red and green traffic lights I encounter on my journeys. I dismiss her suggestion – Why should I try to disprove what I already know to be true. Besides, I have lots and lots of time to think about this theory... while I am stopped at the many traffic lights on my way.