Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Dick Does Denver

I'm thinking even my Christian friends might raise an eyebrow or two after listening to this nut guy. There isn't much more I can add here; the video speaks for itself... although I've always been curious why the uber-evangelicals seem to be so preoccupied with sex?
Runtime 3:50


31 comments:

Infidel753 said...

Ooof, that's nutty.

Considering that anything longer than it is wide can be interpreted as a phallic symbol if one is so inclined, it's hardly surprising that he's seeing them everywhere. (A good question to ask him would be, "Can you suggest an airport lay-out or mural which would not contain anything that could be taken as phallic?") What arouses suspicion is a man, who would doubtless declare himself 100% heterosexual, being so obsessed with phalluses that he sees them in everything around him and creates opportunities like this to talk obsessively about them.

I've always been curious why the uber-evangelicals seem to be so preoccupied with sex?

Obsession is the natural consequence of repression, not its opposite. If someone were taught that hunger and eating were immoral and consequently denied himself food as much as he could, he'd become obsessed and preoccupied with food in the same way.

Paul said...

There are some odd things at the Denver Airport.

Cognitive Dissenter said...

Wow. This explains how my husband and I had the sudden and inexplicable urge to worship Satan, naked, when making a connection out of Denver (pun intended).

All I can say is these people are completely batshit.

P.S. My captcha is coiti. I'm pretty sure that's plural for the Satanic term coital. Your blog must be controlled by Satan. Awesome.

DJan said...

OMG! He must see a phallus everywhere he looks! That was pretty funny, Robert, I especially loved seeing the baggage handling area of DIA's testicles. Bwahahaha!

Jayne said...

Bwahahaha! How can someone who is also known as "The Third Eagle of the Apocalypse" expect to be taken seriously? This is hilarious--I can't believe, however, that William neglected to mention the most obvious of all the airport's phallic symbols: the plane, itself. Apparently, William's You Tuber authorities failed to point this out.
Thank you, William, for the critique. Next time I fly into Denver I'll be prepared to brace myself for all the airport sex and violence. (And the bad art, too.) ;)

Buz said...

OMG! Should we nuke the airport just to be safe?

I love the title of your post.

Robert the Skeptic said...

Infidel I have long suspected that Oppression-obsession psychosis in these folks. Like Rev. Ted Haggard of Colorado secretly having homosexual liaisons, or Senator Larry Craig, same issue. These "family Values" politicians seem to be the hardest to fall from grace. The list goes on.

Paul Indeed there are, but mostly those things have had to do with missing and mangled baggage.

Dissenter Indeed I do contact Satan before every post, just to make sure I am doing his "work". He even checks my grammar.

Robert the Skeptic said...

DJan I wonder if the people designing the baggage handling area had any engineering problems to overcome in forcing the design to look like a penis? It must be difficult to start with a phallic premise and have to design something functional around that shape.

Jayne I kept wondering just WHO the authority was to appointed him "Third Eagle", and I am curious who number one and two are? If the "Forth Eagle" position is open, I'd like to apply.

Buz SMITE is the correct term for destroying such defilement. Nuking is too earthy.

Wow, that was awkward said...

I've heard our airport is basically a brothel in hell. Must be why I like traveling so much and am always there.

That horse is indeed pretty freaky. Not for the stuff the idiot in the video complains about, but rather because it is kind of scary and evil looking. It has red eyes that light up at night. And the artist really did die while finishing it. There is nothing satanic about it though. Its just aggressive and not really a friendly welcome/goodbye from Colorado.

Kay Dennison said...

Just when I think the nut jobs have gone too far, they go even further. These alleged humanoids have really dirty minds! I bet the could find sex in a math book.

Robert the Skeptic said...

Awkward If you want to see a really scary airport statue, try John Wayne Orange County airport! They have this statue of "The Duke" in their lobby that stands about 5 times the guy's original height. Makes me wet my pants each time I pass it on the way to baggage claim.

Kay Yeah these guys find all kinds of "codes" and numerology in the bible but seem to miss the bible verses hidden in the math books. I for one certainly found the work of the devil in my algebra text.

Antares Cryptos said...

Had to skip through it, because...:)

I guess he doesn't eat carrots or bananas. Or eggs. Or apples.

Freud could have published an entire book on this guy alone.

Wait a sec, the four horsemen are bringing back endangered eagles?

billy pilgrim said...

i'm sending away for the free book.

Jon said...

I am surprised he would even go to an airport, what with all those phallic shaped airplanes. Air travel, therefore, must be the work of satan, or some shit. And he kept a straight face through the whole spiel. Unbelievable!

Mandy_Fish said...

His face is a phallic symbol. His nose is shaped like a penis, his chin is the ball sack, and his beard and mustache are obvious repenisations of pubic hair.

Pure penile evil.

Kay Dennison said...

LOL Robert! I thought it was Geometry and Trig that were the devil's work. Maybe it was the 'x' thing that got ya!

Another thing about these types that do this that bothers me is their interest in war but don't notice the shape of submarines and missiles.

Google is paying attention, too -- the captcha letters are -- I kid you not -- 'sword'!!! LOL

GutsyWriter said...

This is extremely funny. I'm amazed how people will study anything in such depth. As my husband would probably say, "Someone with too much time on their hands."

alwaysinthebackrow said...

Okay, I have to admit that I laughed so hard I nearly had tears in my eyes as he was describing "the testicles" of the Denver airport. Whew!
I think that the cross is a phallic symbol. Turn it upside down, and notice how the long ends points up, just as an erect penis would be, and the perpendicular line is clearly representative of the testicles.
What? Can't you see that?? I do. Does that make me obsessed with the phallus? Maybe so.

Robert the Skeptic said...

Cryptos It wouldn't be as hilarious if this guy was joking, but he is SERIOUS. He has a whole series of these videos.

Billy I should send for the book as well.

Jon I guess if oblong objects have wings, that makes them, what... less phallic?

Robert the Skeptic said...

Kay Well everyone knows that the implements of war are shaped like male anatomy.

Gusty Too much time indeed... and I think he could use a girl friend as well.

BackRow I wonder if someone ever stopped him and asked: "Wait a minute, you think all the hundreds of people designing this airport REALLY got together and conspired about how to hide phallic symbols in the design? REALLY!!??"

Tommykey said...

Obsession is the natural consequence of repression, not its opposite.

If you ever saw the movie Chocolat, you might remember the scene where the prudish town mayor breaks into Juliette Binoche's chocolate shop (IIRC, he viewed her as some sort of corrupt influence to the good folk of the town) and binged out on her chocolates. The next morning he is found passed out in the window of her shop.

Tommykey said...

What arouses suspicion is a man, who would doubtless declare himself 100% heterosexual, being so obsessed with phalluses that he sees them in everything around him and creates opportunities like this to talk obsessively about them.

I guess the guy doesn't eat hot dogs either.

secret agent woman said...

He lost me at "also known as the third eagle of the apocalypse."

secret agent woman said...

Wow, I kept watching. That guy isn't just obsessed with sex, but with male genitals. Closeted, maybe?

Robert the Skeptic said...

Tommykey Indeed, I thinks the man doth protest too much.

SecretAgent As matters of the psyche are your stock-and-trade, I would certainly accept your assessment.

Infidel753 said...

TK: I guess the guy doesn't eat hot dogs either.

Except occasionally, after which he's found passed out in front of the hot-dog stand after a binge.

Paul said...

Robert how about those crystal gazers down at Sedona ? Or channelers ? :-) Talk about nut jobs !

adrielleroyale said...

One minute into it and I've had enough..oye.

Antares Cryptos said...

He's so SERIOUS, no one can take him seriously. ;)
Still amused. Thank you.

Robert the Skeptic said...

Paul some of those folks are actually pretty harmless, though deluded. The ones who promote their agend based on fear and retribution are disturbing.

Adrielle Third Eagle does kind of dig himself in, doesn't he.

Cryptos Third Eagle has his own channel and bunch of these loony tunes.

Kiwi Monster said...

Wait! Wait! What's so evil about penises? I must be missing something here. Oh, right... the years of brainwashing and repression. Missed out on some choice psychoses, apparently. :P